Hello

[Philip Henderson]

This is Philip from Belfast N.Ireland. I go to AA but find the religous overtones extremely off putting .

I have dual diagnosis disorder including OCD anx, dep,plus who knows what
personality problems!!!!!!.

Not having a good time My wife has similar problems and has resumed drinking and I am not coping v well.I went to my local Godly AA group this am and the meeting was ok. For me I take what I want from AA and leave the rest. The BB does my head in and I prefer to read Eckhart Tolle as his stuff actualy makes some sense to me .....

Just saying hello

PS Do you like my scary piccy??????

Philip

[SocraticGadfly]

I would think being too religious in AA in Northern Ireland would be dicey anyway!

[Philip Henderson]

No not really this country is full of religious nutcases and my local group has a cross community membership
even though it is in protestant East Belfast.Actually AA has crossed the religious divide throughout the hostilities
which I am actually quite surprised about.. However if you are an unbeliever in the christian sense it really doesnt go down very well.....It is only recently I feel that unbelievers can now come out as there is now a slight degree of tolerance creeping into our society

Philip

[kathy l]

Welcome, Phillip. No religion will be preached to you here in LifeRing, even though many of us may be very spiritual. No steps. Just lots of help for you in formulating a sobriety plan that works for you. I have a panic disorder as well, plus an eating disorder, so you're in good company! Hope to see you in chat sometime.

[Philip Henderson]

Thanx Kathy ..... So there is a chat function going to have to find it! I am still a bit bewildered.about this site...Oh I like cats as well

Philip

[Michael Martin]

Hi Philip! It always does me good to know that others may well find strength in their belief systems but that I still prefer a sense of wonder and cannot pretend that I know about all the mysteries. It's not that I feel I'm giving the faithful my permission, it's just that I know that some of my sources of strength. such as social justice activism, would not make any more sense to them, in fact would probably seem well-night damned. Still, I am not offended by different stokes, only by intrusions into my ability to find my way without know-it-alls trying to give me the 'inside poop.' Peace, Michael.

[SocraticGadfly]

Philip, go to www.unhooked.com and click the links for getting into the chat room.

[Crystal Dillon]

Welcome to lifering,
Hi i'm Crystal, I've been sober for 7 months. Its a good road your taking, please take care of yourself, and know that you can do it if you need to. AA is different here in Canada, they don't push religion on you. But i don't really go to AA. I started out by reading books on soberity, and trying to find a way to make some sence out of my life. I think its good that you take what fits you best, no one has all the answers, and not every alcohol, or addict is the same. In my opinon. So keep up the good work, and expressing ones self helps me the best.
Thanks for your time,
Crystal

[Philip Henderson]

Thanks Crystal and everyone I had to leave my wife a few days ago due to her drinking
This is not easy..... got an abusive phonecall at midnight ,couldnt sleep .. had to take today off.. feeling washed out. Still going to AA and finding our wee group a lot more tolerant than I originally thought, I did the talk on Thurs and got a lot of positive response though. Today my OCD thoughts are going bananas I seem to feel that I can be somehow dragged back into the unhealthy situation against my will. doesnt make a lot of sense......

Philip

[Philip Henderson]

Hi

This is Philip again its been a few months since I have been in contact.its amazing how thinking can go off
into different directions. I have finally split from my wife couldnt take it any more and am now living with my mum,not ideal but probably for the best. Wife has been seriously ill with liver failure and I am keeping an eye on things from the sidelines.
have got a new girlfriend,probably not the best idea but I am managing ok,you cant always choose who you fall for.
Recent problem with her has led me to start step4 with a sensible sponsor. It seems that I have a lot of emotional issues from way way back which are one of the main reasons I drink and get into unsuitable relationships its a n adventure now teasing all these emotions out
Starting to feel a bit more positive, have a lot of friends. And am getting positive medical help for the health problems I got while drinking....Nice to be back

Philip

[roy]

hello there nice to see some one from ireland here,my father was irish and was a big big drinker, so thats probally
where i get my drinking problems from ,its strange i went over to newtownards where my father was born and i was drinking from early morning till late into the night ,when there and i even had blood discharge when i went to the toilet and yet i still carried on drinking,work commitments stopped me from killing myself here or putting myself into a early grave any way,i did A A for five years and remaind dry for thar period ,but being far from religous in the end i could not accept all this higher power ,and i guess as the saying goes in AA that they stick with the winners, and dont let the dead wood drag them down,,well i must have been that dead wood and became a loser ,and found that after falling off the wagon i did not want to go back because thats how they made me feel,guess if i went to A A in newtownards i certainly would tell them a few stories to break there heart s i'm sure for it would me just telling them,,who is Eckhart Tolle??

[Philip Henderson]

Hi Roy

Newtownards is just a few miles from me and I have been to a few alanon meetings inthe rooms there. I understand where you are coming from about this higher power stuff I prefer to use it as a model rather than reality.

I realise that i am not the centre of the universe and that there are many many things more powerful than me, this helps me listen and take advice and develope a degree of humility,sod all to do with religion more cognitive behaviour therapy.

Eckhart Tolle is a guy who has gained a useful insight into the way things are.he talks about remaining in the present moment as the present moment is all there is. He has a great book called the Power of Now which is well worth reading, to me it makes sense and I know a lot of non relgious AAs who swear by it,
he has a few clips on you tube and the like.
We have a great group in East Belfast where the only requirement is a desire to stop drinking. There are a few water walkers but thankfully they are in the minority and no one makes anyone feel crap if they go out again. There is a little intolerance towards those with alternative lifestyles from some of the older members but thankfully these attitudes are being gently challenged.
For me AA is what there is and I make it fit my life and am managing well up to now