Audrey Kishline speaks

[SocraticGadfly]

Kishline, the founder of Moderation Management who killed a girl and her father in a 2000 drunken driving accident, and so undercut MM and at the same time, got used as a PR prop for AA, has a “co-biography” just on the shelves, written with Sheryl Maloy, the wife/mother of the two dead people.

“Face to Face,” which I just checked out from the library, certainly promises to be interesting.

[SocraticGadfly]

Here's the poop on the book:

“Face to Face” is Kishline’s “co-autobiography with Sheryl Maloy, the estranged wife and mother to the two people Kishline killed in her DWI accident in 2000.

It's pretty interesting. For 1-2 yrs before the accident, she recognized she was past the "moderation" level, and as people familiar with the story know, told MM members that. She got drunk that particular day to screw up the courage to leave her husband, which she eventually did some time after getting out of prison.

Kishline did attend an occasional SMART meeting before founding MM, as she details in the book. She later, after her admission to MM members, started going to Women for Sobriety as well as going back to AA. Beyond that, she apparently didn’t look for other alternatives, such as Lifering or Secular Organizations for Sobriety.

That said, for the majority of Lifering members, the book may be of limited value in some ways, especially those who are not religious

The book is pretty heavy with religion, is the main thing. Maloy is a clear evangelical Christian, including believing in premonitions (note: a skeptic will ask, “Where’s the premonitions that never come true”) and Kishline moves in a more religious direction, combining threads of this type of Christianity with a mix of New Ageism/religious fatalism she seemed to have before.

Kishline obviously won’t be looking for AA alternatives now that she is out of prison, either, as this quote shows:

“God is part of everything, whether we acknowledge it or not.”

That said, the book has its drama, nowhere more than when Maloy goes to Kishline’s prison to tell her in person, “I forgive you.”

And, Kishline won’t be part of AA, either. In the most surprising item in the book, she says she still drinks regularly and even gets drunk at times. If that’s not enough to remind everybody of the tragedy of alcoholism and the powerful hold of alcohol, maybe her prison and post-prison story is.

She was sentenced to 4.5 years; she served 3 years inside and the rest on a variety of outside ways, such as work-release jobs, halfway house rehab counseling, etc. As an ex-con, namely an ex-felon, she said she had trouble finding decent jobs at times, and wound up moving in with her mom and her mom’s new husband for a while, at the age of 45.

So, too, the power of alcohol, but also the power to move beyond it, is reflected in the story that Kishline’s two sisters are both former alcoholic-level drinkers, though both sober now — one through AA and one on her own.

Also some other interesting background. Maloy’s dad had a drunk-driving one-car accident on the autobahn in Germany while in the military. Maloy admits she could have headed down Kishline’s road, especially with an extended history of physical and emotional abuse from her parents and sexual abuse from a childhood friend of her dad’s.

Finally, the book, from Kishline’s side, shows how effed up the American prison system is in dealing with people with mental health problems. Despite Kishline clearly having anxiety and depression problems, her early parole work release required her to be medication free, part of why she eventually relapsed from it.

[SocraticGadfly]

I'm not meaning any slight, Lane. She was convicted of felony vehicular manslaughter, though, and so was an ex-felon when she got out of prison. And, that does make it tough to find both a job and rental housing.

What I'm getting at is the tragedy, or worse, of someone still drinking, and still, even though calling alcohol an "emotional crutch," refusing to come to terms with her drinking after what she caused.

[laurie]

After her release from prison Kishline violated her probation by once again consuming large amount of alcohol. Her probation officer was notified by Kishline's sister and she did serve another 45 days in prison. That is when her husband left her and her children refused to see her.

[Honesthought]

I look forward to reading this. what is sad is she cannot get sober. What the public needs to know is the role Stanton Peele had, and that is so he can be stopped. I believe addiction is a "disease" as classified, and it is real. I take offense at the phrase that her story was used as an AA prop. It is the sharing of experiences that help some people realize their " yets" out there if they continue to drink. I think it's time for people to stop bashing AA, as it has helped millions of people worldwide. For some reason this just seems to annoy people. I don't get it. for those who it did not help, they had other problems, or they did not use the tools of the program. You can not use a can opener to mash potatoes, oh you could, but it's a much tougher and longer process. You might even hurt yourself. If you just use the tools of AA as they are, then sobriety is easier to obtain.

[BartR]

For some people perhaps, and that is a BIG "MAYBE". Not for all and that is a big "ABSOLUTELY."

If you find AA works well for you then by all means use what you have found works. For some, maybe delusion is better than drinking.

I think an AA site might better suit you since you seem to have made up your mind that AA is a philosophy you wish to follow, or at least promote. I suggest you inquire there.

_THIS_ site is about Sobriety, Secularity and Self-Help. It promotes an absence of drinking, an absence of reliance upon invisible higher-power/god/alien beings and features an individual's ability to help themself.

[Mike Dailey]

Yes Socrat I remember someone talking to me about her and the accident after an aa meeting. Is the book called ,"Audry Kishline speaks ", or ,Face to Face"?

[SocraticGadfly]

Yes, Mike, that's the book; "Face to Face." "Audrey Kishline speaks" may be its subtitle.

[SocraticGadfly]

So, it's all and entirely the fault of the person involved if "AA doesn't work." Just the drinking person should "adapt" himself/herself, "honesthought," and not AA, which should remain... rigid? doctrinaire? absolutist?

Why are you even a member of this site, since I am going to infer you think Lifering is "wrong" too and anybody here who has a "slip" just needs to go to AA?

[BartR]

Very interesting Steve. Thanks for posting your balanced review of this book.